As a married woman, I hoped for a good family and have a baby of my own. I was imagining myself for quite a while now like thinking “What would it be like if I had my little ones?” Will he/she inspires me? Will he/she motivates me to be at my best of all time? Will he/she gives me the happiness that I couldn’t find in this world? Maybe, if a little one comes my facebook, twitter, instagram, blogs and other related websites will be flooded with picture of her/him. I will probably flood my closet with many albums just for her/him. Every details will be important for him/her as well as for me. It brings happiness by thinking this.
I am always hearing so many stories about mom, and saw some friends with their little ones somehow I envy them. They tell their stories about being mom and posting pictures, and looking at them, I can see their happiness that you wouldn’t find from any single ladies. Looks that a mother only has for their little ones. I always come to this point where I could just wish that one day I’ll have one, yet I am afraid it won’t come. As I type these words, I could almost cry imagining how happy it would be, and feeling regret of the event that be fall on me. A friend of mine told me that I might not be ready why God hasn’t given me little ones. Maybe she’s right, it now gives me the doubt if I can grow and protect a child with my own hands. Please, let me take these feelings into this writing just for once. I, also carry a burden that breaks my heart to the most that it kills me inside. As much as I want to control it, somehow it results to tears because I couldn’t carry heavily inside me.